Tomorrow, I am going to run 50 miles. I’m ridiculously terrified and stupidly excited in equal measure. I have been planning and dreaming about this race for over a year now – ever since I thought of volunteering at last year’s event in order to get a free place this year. It was the main focus of my training throughout my work-break, meaning that I’ve been specifically training for it since the end of 2017. It’s been a long time coming, and yet the time has also flown by incredibly quickly.
Tomorrow, I am going to run 50 miles. It’s nearly twice as far as I have ever run before in one go, and I have no idea how my body will handle the extra distance. There are so many things that could go wrong, from blisters to my body rejecting food, to getting lost, getting injured or missing the cut-off times. With the unknown of the distance comes the reality that perhaps I won’t make it to the finish line. It’s a whole new ball-game, a leap into the dark.
Tomorrow, I will run 50 miles. Yes, I will. Because despite all the fears, I have a solid confidence in the pit of my stomach which tells me that no matter what happens, I will pull through. I have done the training – albeit not following the most ‘normal’ of training plans – and have built up the endurance needed to cover the distance. I am not afraid of the ups and downs, both on the course and in the emotions I will inevitably feel. I am excited to give this a shot.
Tomorrow, I will run 50 miles. My bags are prepped, the long lists of planning and instructions have been made, Sye is ready to crew me along the way. I’ve walked part of the course, stared at the maps, and know what lies ahead. I have controlled what I can control, and the rest will just happen in whichever way the pieces fall.
Tomorrow, I am going to run 50 miles, and I have no idea how long it will take. I have contingency plans for everything from the most superb day possible, to the cut-off times in case things go the opposite way. I have a rough idea of what I should be able to run, but I’m not stressed about staring at my watch to achieve those goals. You cannot run this race to even splits, because the hills and terrain prevent any rhythm. Instead I will listen to my body and be wise with my energies, all focused on reaching the end as strongly as possible.
Tomorrow, I am going to run 50 miles. That thought keeps ringing around my head non-stop, causing mini freak-outs which I am trying to contain. A friend messaged me saying ‘You are Julia. You are great. It’s kinda what you do’ and deep down I know this is true. I continuously challenge myself, but within realistic limits which I know I can achieve. It is a pushing of the limits, not a moon-shot adventure with likely failure. This challenge is well within my reach, all I need now is to go run it.
Tomorrow, I will run, walk, enjoy, hate, savour, fight, relish, push through, complete – finish 50 miles. Bring it on.